Just listening to the new album, painting my nails and munching on a Yves Klein Blue cupcake and thought i'd just quickly drop you a line with a few reasons why myself and Chloe want to be side of stage during your set :)
Its day 2 of the blue diet transformation and feeling pretty good, still pink but we're getting there. I found it pretty easy to stick to my diet today but I still got the 4pm chocolate cravings so i cured them with a trip to BP for an overpriced bag of m&m's and picked out the blue ones to eat.
The Yves Klein blue food dye will not come off my fingers so if i dont turn blue from the inside out, i can work the other way.
Anyhoo... here's my list:
1. We do amazing pre-performance pep talks and motivational speeches
2. We make amazing back up dancers
2. We make even better back up vocals
3. We have matching
Polka dot dresses reading to rip out and dance around
4. Our mother just got home from overseas with eight litres of Johnnie Walker Gold Label Whisky. In the wise words of Little Rascals Casanova, Alfalfa, “what’s mine is yours!”
5. We’ve never been on stage
6. Being side of stage may distract me from my Michael Jackson grieving for 45 minutes
7. Chloe works at Gloria Jeans – A QUALIFIED BARISTA. She makes orgasmic coffee, not like in the USA and UK. You WILL NEED a decent cup of joe for energy before the set
8. Amber is a part time stylist with a huge collection of vintage clothing for your costumes
9. We know every word to every song, even the ones you haven’t written yet
10. While you play we can reserve a seat at the bar to enjoy a gin sling after the show
11. We can also fight climate change during your set to ensure your maximum comfort
12. We can help set up and take down stuff
13. We will get the crowd super dooper, exponentially pumped/psyched/excited/stimulated for you guys
14. You know we can cook – we’ll make pies with mashed potatoes peas and gravy and onions on a Trangia for your post performance meal
15. We are to interpretative dance what Bomb Funk MC’s are to freestylin’
16. We are you biggest fans… if you hadn’t cottoned on already
17. Draw attention to themselves
18. Every time you pick up an instrument I’ll be there inside ya wearing ya like a glove
19. Draw attention to themselves
20. We can drink beer, eat souva’s and chat politics after the set
Love Amber xo
